As caregivers, our days are filled with tasks that can be overwhelming. Not only are we managing our own lives, homes, children, and work, but we are now managing another person who may not be able to care for themselves. In the long term, caregiving can have a negative impact: compassion fatigue, which can create physical, emotional, and spiritual distress. Yet for many, there is a component of caregiving known as compassion satisfaction.
The concept of compassion satisfaction is real but often not discussed, since the impact of caregiving can be so negative that it results in compassion fatigue. Caregiving with compassion implies a desire to help someone who is suffering and to alleviate their suffering. The suffering may occur as physical pain or psychological pain.
Caring with compassion and deriving satisfaction from the role may not mean you can end their suffering. Caring that recognizes suffering, even when it has not changed, means you can still be present and offer support. Certainly, there may be good days, and their pain may be eased, but you can still give them the care and support that they need on a daily basis, knowing that it will not change the outcome.
Compassion satisfaction is a sign of resilience. For the vast majority of caregivers, there is no respite. Finding compassion throughout the days provides resilience in the face of the negative aspects of caregiving.
One key component of compassionate care is self-compassion. There can be times when you feel overwhelmed, unsure, and exhausted. It is in these moments that you need to remember that it is ok feel overwhelmed, unsure, and exhausted. In these moments, you need to be gentle with yourself and acknowledge that you don’t need to provide perfect care to be a caregiver. It is ok to acknowledge your own suffering.
While compassion satisfaction is a sign of resilience, it is also important to recognize when you need to reach out for help. For many, the average time spent as a caregiver is 4 to 5 years, and the average weekly time is 40 hours. When you feel depleted, seek respite and support from family, friends, and community resources.
Here are several resources: Area Agencies on Aging (Area Agencies on Aging), Caregivers Action Network (Caregivers Action Network), VA Caregivers Support (VA Caregivers Support), or call 211.
Compassion satisfaction is knowing at the end of the day that you provided the best care you were capable of. You may have only been able to be present and keep them safe and comfortable. At the end of the day, you were gentle with yourself and okay with your own imperfections.
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